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This Is Your Brain on Sex: The Science Behind the Search for Love Paperback – Illustrated, March 26, 2013

by Kayt Sukel (Author)
4.2 4.2 out of 5 stars 72 ratings
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Previously published as Dirty Minds: How Our Brains Influence Love, Sex, and Relationships.

PHILOSOPHERS, THEOLOGIANS, ARTISTS, AND BOY BANDS HAVE WAXED poetic for centuries about the nature of love. But what does the brain have to say about the way we carry our hearts? In the wake of a divorce, science writer and single mother Kayt Sukel made herself a guinea pig in the labs of some unusual love experts to find out. This Is Your Brain on Sex is her lively and hilarious examination of the big questions about love and sex, previously published in hardcover as Dirty Minds.

Each chapter of this edgy romp through the romantic brain looks at a different aspect of love above the belt. What in your brain makes you love someone—or simply lust after them? Why do good girls like bad boys? Is monogamy practical? How thin is that line between love and hate? After reading this gimlet-eyed look at love, sex, and the brain, you’ll never look at romance the same way again.
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  1. Print length
    288 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    March 26, 2013
  4. Dimensions
    5.5 x 1 x 8.38 inches
  5. ISBN-10
    9781451611564
  6. ISBN-13
    978-1451611564
  7. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"A serious, informative and highly entertaining survey of the neurobiology of sexual attraction.” ― The Washington Post

“A fun and insightful read [that] manages to evoke the feel of both a wine-laden conversation with an old friend and a great neuroscience lecture from your favorite college professor." ― Scientific American Mind

"It was the cotton-top tamarin monkeys that did it for me...Sukel's book fairly bristles with such causes to reflect on our erotic complexity." ― Ben Dickinson, ELLE magazine

"With humor and flair, Sukel takes us through the whole human drama -- loving, hating, cheating, losing, orgasming, parenting, punishment, and reward -- and at the end we realize something truly startling: it's all in our minds." -- Jena Pincott, author of Do Chocolate Lovers Have Sweeter Babies?: The Surprising Science of Pregnancy

"Kayt Sukel's [Dirty Minds] merges the bracing realities of science with the mysterious thrill of love and attraction. Provocative, well-researched, and compulsively readable, this book opens the mind (dirty or otherwise) and stirs the soul." -- Lily Burana, author of Strip City, Try, and I Love a Man in Uniform

"Love and sex are two of the eternal mysteries of the human experience--but in her compelling new book . . . Kayt Sukel lifts the curtain to give us a fresh and fascinating look at our intimate lives. Sukel shows us how neuroscientists are venturing into the realm once reserved for poets and songwriters, and returning with bold new knowledge about the brain in love and in the throes of pleasure. After reading this seductively interesting book, you'll never think about a date or a kiss or a breakup the same way again." -- Annie Murphy Paul, author of Origins: How the Nine Months Before Birth Shape the Rest of Our Lives

About the Author

Kayt Sukel’s work has appeared in myriad publications, including Atlantic Monthly, USA TODAY, The Washington Post, National Geographic Traveler, Continental, American Baby, and Cerebrum. She is a partner in the renowned family travel website, TravelSavvyMom.com, blogs about where neuroscience intersects with life at BigThink, and is also a frequent contributor to the Dana Foundation’s many science publications.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ 1451611560
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Simon & Schuster; Illustrated edition (March 26, 2013)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 288 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 9781451611564
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1451611564
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 9.3 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 1 x 8.38 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.2 4.2 out of 5 stars 72 ratings

About the author

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Kayt Sukel

Kayt Sukel

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Full content visible, double tap to read brief content.

Kayt Sukel knows more about sex than you do. (According to Forbes, at any rate...)

A passionate traveler and science writer, she has no problem tackling interesting (and often taboo) subjects spanning love, sex, neuroscience, travel and politics. Her work has appeared in the Atlantic Monthly, the New Scientist, USA Today, Pacific Standard, the Washington Post, ISLANDS, Parenting, the Bark, American Baby, National Geographic Traveler, and the AARP Bulletin. She is a partner at the award-winning family travel website Travel Savvy Mom, and is also a frequent contributor to the Dana Foundation's many science publications. She has written stories about out-of-body experiences, fMRI orgasms, computer models of schizophrenia, the stigma of single motherhood, and why one should travel to exotic lands with young children.

Her first book, DIRTY MINDS: HOW OUR BRAINS INFLUENCE LOVE, SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS (retitled as THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON SEX: THE SCIENCE BEHIND THE SEARCH FOR LOVE in paperback), is an irreverent and funny tome that takes on the age-old question, "What is love?" from a neurobiological perspective. Called "a fun and insightful read," by Scientific American Mind and "a serious, informative and highly entertaining survey of the neurobiology of sexual attraction," by the Washington Post, DIRTY MINDS/THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON SEX offers a new take on that crazy little thing called love.

Her new book, THE ART OF RISK: THE NEW SCIENCE OF COURAGE, CAUTION & CHANCE, an investigation into the science of risk-taking, will be published in March 2016.

A popular public speaker, Kayt has graced the stages of TEDMED, Chicago Ideas Week and renowned universities across the continent. She lives outside Houston, Texas (and is surprised as you are about it), and frequently overshares on Twitter as @kaytsukel.

Customer reviews

4.2 out of 5 stars
4.2 out of 5
72 global ratings
Great book on sex/love, not for everyone though.
5 Stars
Great book on sex/love, not for everyone though.
I would say that this book may frustrate most people, mainly because most people are looking for "black or white" ideas, and are looking to simplistic advice on how to resolve their love/sex related challenges.Now, if you're the kind of person who deals well with uncertainty and the "grayness" that is natural to our current limited understanding of the brain as it relates to specific behavior/emotions, as well as the ambiguity of human/social behavior, you will like this book.It's neither too technical, nor too personal, and some chapters are amazing, specially when the author connects the concept/idea she's discussing, to her own life and the moment she's going through. By the way, Kayt's soul is here in this book, and this making the reading really delightful for many moments.It's an honest, delightful, interesting and intriguing book, it really sheds a light into love/sex, but it's not for everyone unfortunately.
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Top reviews from the United States

A. George
5.0 out of 5 stars Highly Recommended
Reviewed in the United States on January 8, 2012
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Kayt Sukel's debut takes a long, hard look at human relationships from a unique perspective. With her background in neuroscience, Sukel examines what goes on inside our brains when we think about love, and sex, and all that good stuff. It's a fascinating read. The brain is such a complex organ that much of the studies performed so far are not conclusive, but the book sheds a whole new light on some of the most enduring questions of mankind, which have hitherto primarily been the provence of artists, writers, and musicians. The collision of biology with the vaguer arenas of emotion and love is a compelling saga in itself. The author does a wonderful job of setting out the research in a way that makes it easy for non-scientists like me to understand. If this all sounds a little dry, though, don't be fooled. It is an extremely funny book, and Sukel's ultra-dry wit had me chuckling throughout. Informative, entertaining, relevant - who could ask for more?
5 people found this helpful
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anothermother
4.0 out of 5 stars Decent Book.
Reviewed in the United States on November 15, 2013
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It's a good book. Seemed to have taken a lot of information from other books written on the same subject. Maybe the other books took from her...I'm not sure. Interesting...especially if you like prairie voles.
One person found this helpful
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J Robert Ims
3.0 out of 5 stars Kayt covers the ins and outs of brain activation for just about every aspect of loving and love making. And
Reviewed in the United States on August 10, 2015
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Detailed, indeed. Kayt covers the ins and outs of brain activation for just about every aspect of loving and love making. And, which reward center in the brain gets which reward. What we won't do for science! Three cheers for the Voles.
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CLK CarolLee Kidd
5.0 out of 5 stars A better understanding of me!
Reviewed in the United States on January 16, 2012
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I had so been waiting for this book to come out and it didn't disappoint. After growing up in a somewhat - hello more than somewhat - dysfunctional family and having really bad relationships pretty much all my life, I looked to this book as a guide to help myself overcome the usual habits I follow when in a relationship - any relationship.

This isn't a relationship book per se. This is a source to understand our relationships and how our brains react or don't react to what we think our heart wants and body desires. Just knowing and understanding the science of what is going on gives me peace of mind that it isn't that I am unloveable but I have been placing so much weight on how someone reacts to me that I neglected how I truly felt and reacted to myself and to them, and I just haven't found the one who I can be me with and let go of the games I play with myself, much less the games we play with each other. Where was this book 30 years ago?

I have read the book and am reading it a second time - with my current boyfriend, and my male and female friends alike - and the discussions we have been able to hold about the book and each other are witty, open, informative, and so looked forward to by all.

Learning something new is always a great thing for everybody - learning something new and understanding more about yourself at the same time is the topping on the cake.

It's a whole new way to understand who you are and why you love the way you do.
12 people found this helpful
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jamiepea
5.0 out of 5 stars So scientific! So readable!
Reviewed in the United States on January 12, 2012
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What is the nature of love (and its close cousin lust)? Kayt Sukel breaks it down both neuroscientifically and matter-of-factly. She shows us exactly what happens in the risk/reward part of the brain when we fall in love, fall out of love, make a baby, have a child, have an orgasm, parent, cheat, or decide not to.

There's a lot more to it all than estrogen, testosterone, oxytocin, and dopamine, but you'll get great insights into why (probably) we've evolved to behave the way we do when it comes to the objects of our affection.

This is a really fascinating subject (obviously) and an enjoyable read.
3 people found this helpful
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Michael S. Sanders
4.0 out of 5 stars Forget the Title
Reviewed in the United States on November 10, 2012
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For anyone interested in the latest research on how the brain works this is a beautifully written, painstakingly researched valuable addition to the literature. In fact one can go further in suggesting that it is a must read for all who ponder on what we are and how we operate. One day I hope Ms. Sukel will actually write the book described in the title, thankfully this book is not it but a much more valuable work.
2 people found this helpful
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EricMayle
5.0 out of 5 stars Funny and Insightful if You Read It the Right Way.
Reviewed in the United States on January 7, 2013
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I gave this book 5 stars without thinking twice. I enjoyed it immensely, and I learned a lot. BUT it must be said that if you read this book as being about love, you are going to be sorely disappointed, and probably not find it as funny or insightful. If you're reading it for some sort of sex thrill... you're not going to like it unless you've got a thing for rats. And if you do, you're gonna like this. Buy it, and then never go out in public again please. This is a book about neuroscience. Pure and simple. That said, it's a damn good one and you should read it.

This book is written in a style that will make you wish Sukel had written all of your science textbooks in high school (and even some of your college ones). Conversational tones applied to well-understood scientific concepts enable even a layman to work through the science-y parts without a thesaurus, a copy of Grey's, or a DSM. Further, most chapters have a fun little part where the concepts being scientifically discussed are put in motion in real-world examples. The end result is a reader who doesn't fully understand all the neuroscience, but understands the broad strokes, the implications, the questions that have been and can be answered and, more importantly, the questions that (as of now) cannot be.
5 people found this helpful
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teetime
3.0 out of 5 stars Dirty Minds
Reviewed in the United States on June 10, 2012
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This book is definately written from the scientific approach, under the disquise of a new mom, and divorced lady. It is rambling, hard and difficult to follow, and actually no conclusions are reached. I would not read again...
Phyllis
3 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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viraj pradhan
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Reviewed in India on May 9, 2015
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interesting.
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H.R.B
5.0 out of 5 stars good product
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 13, 2013
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product was in good condition
were it not for the hideous piece of coursework that i had to do about it then i would have enjoyed it more
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ronaldotheoneandonly
5.0 out of 5 stars Gefällt mir
Reviewed in Germany on September 11, 2013
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Sehr interessant zu lesen, modern und verständlich geschrieben und inhaltlich überzeugend ohne zu langweilen. Solche Bücher über wissenschaftliche Themen schreiben die Angloamerikaner einfach besser als viele Europäer.
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Matt
3.0 out of 5 stars Good book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 21, 2014
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I had to buy a book to review for my degree course in my biopsychology module and i choose this one as it appealed most to me due to the interesting and more novel topic it is based on. The authors style is very clear and although it is non fiction i did feel like i couldn't put it down.
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